BELIEVE IT OR NOT, BEING HAPPY IS EASIER THAN IT SOUNDS! ALL YOU NEED DO IS THINK HAPPY AND MAKES SOMEONE HAPPY!
How to Be Happy
at Work
By Miriam Salpeter | U.S.News & World Report LP – Wed, Oct 30, 2013 9:19 PM SGT
How important is it to
be happy? It's an often-asked question lately, fueled by numerous studies
exploring happiness and what makes
people happy. According to a recent study of 82 young adults' Facebook
habits, spending too much time on that social media website might result in
declining happiness over time. In a recent article for the New York Times,
Sonja Lyubomirsky, psychology professor at the University of California at
Riverside and author of "The Myths of Happiness," is noted for saying
that each of us has a unique "happiness set point" that doesn't
really change much, no matter what we do.
How much influence do we
really have on our own happiness? Do we control it? Jude Bijou, psychotherapist
and award-winning author of "Attitude Reconstruction: A Blueprint for
Building a Better Life," has found that anyone can learn ways to boost their
mood and be happier. "The science is interesting," Bijou says.
"But what's even more crucial are the small behaviors over which we have
control. Behavioral change is the bread and butter of happiness."
Since most people spend
a majority of their time at work, here are some of Bijou's suggestions for how
to remain upbeat and positive on the job.
1. Help a colleague or
co-worker. One of the quickest and most effective ways to
change a "poor me" attitude is to reach out to someone in the
workplace who could use your mentoring or assistance with a project. "Give
without expecting anything in return," Bijou says. "This instantly
shifts the focus from you to another person," and changes your perspective
from an attitude based on anger, fear or sadness to one that's positive,
helping and generous.
2. Improve your personal
brand. "There's always one person in the workplace whom everyone is
happy to see," Bijou says. That's the person who smiles when she sees
you, takes bad news lightly and gives genuine compliments or support
frequently. Bijou says changing how others perceive you will also change how
you feel about yourself. "People will love to work with you because you're
happy. What they don't know is that you're making yourself happier in the
process."
3. Become conscious of
time-based thinking. Bad moods, worry, frustration and general
unhappiness occur when we fixate on the past (what you did wrong in the meeting
or why you got passed up for the promotion) or the future (worrying about
making a deadline or wondering if the team will like your presentation). If
you're feeling depressed or stressed out, "Take a happiness break with an
activity that brings you back to the present moment," Bijou says,
suggesting that you take a quick, brisk walk outdoors or do deep breathing
while trying to empty your mind
of all thoughts.
4. Replace the negative
chatter. According to Bijou, one way to neutralize unhappy thoughts is to
find a statement about yourself that is 100 percent true and can't possibly be
refuted - then keep repeating it until you feel better. This creates a new,
positive thought pattern that replaces the negative one. "The negative
chatter that goes on inside our head is untrue and based on false assumptions
derived from anger, sadness and fear," Bijou says. For example, instead of
"I'll never get all of this done in time," you might say "I'll
do what I can." If you can find a contradictory statement to repeat that's
100 percent true, it will quickly change your mood.
5. Say "no" to
the negativity. You don't have to put up with a bad mood or
negative thinking, according to Bijou. You can say no to it, just as you might to a bully or an
unreasonable request. The first step is to become aware of when we're thinking
mean thoughts about a co-worker, client or employee, or when we're being
hypercritical about ourselves. The second step is to literally say no to that
way of thinking. Bijou recommends you find a private place, such as your car,
and say "no" out loud, at a good volume, while stomping your feet.
"Pretty soon you'll be smiling again. This exercise usually ends up making
people laugh and feel mirthful."
The takeaway is that
there are some very simple ways to change one's mood - quickly and effectively,
Bijou says. Happiness studies are fun to read, but small, deliberate behavioral
change is the real key to feeling upbeat on the job.
Miriam Salpeter is
a job search and social media consultant, career coach, author, speaker, resume
writer, and owner of Keppie
Careers. She is author of Social Networking for Career Success and 100
Conversations for Career Success. Miriam teaches job seekers and entrepreneurs
how to incorporate social media tools along with traditional strategies to
reach their goals.
--------------------------
No comments:
Post a Comment