Thursday, April 14, 2011

CARLSBERG'S NEW LAUNCH; THAT CALLS FOR A CARLSBERG!

Contact; kee@fswmag.com

THAT CALLS FOR A CARLSBERG!

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Who is this? Find out at the, er, bottom
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MD of Carlsberg Malaysia Soren Ravn with his Long, Cool Danes.

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What a great leg show and leg up for Carlsberg's new look

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One for the road! The Carlsberg management headed by MD Soren Ravn and deputy MD Datuk Chin Voon Loong with the new delivery trucks.
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Kee Hua Chee and new friend in the Carlsberg Tent
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What a winning delivery!


The relaunching of Carlsberg's new logo, bottle and slogan at its factory cum headquarters
in Shah Alam was a blast! The line-up of activities was so fun and funky by the end of lunch, all we could do was raise our bottles of Carlsberg and shout 'That calls f0r a Carlsberg!"
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But all these came at a price for me, albeit a small one and getting smaller as we speak.
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Anyway, last Wednesday 6 April I made a major sacrifice for Carlsberg---I woke at the unearthly hour of 6am!
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Chian Siew of Brandthink was coming to pick me at 7.15am to take me to the launching of Carlsberg's new look bottle and new slogan 'That Calls for Carlsberg'! I need an hour to get my act together and I hate waking up early in the morning which explains why I can't carry a day job as I have to be in the office at 9 am unless I am the MD which means I have to be in office at 8am to check on my staff!
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I don't even wake up in the morning for sex let alone beer but Chian Siew swore on the Bible it would be worth it as I would be part of history in the making as 140 nations would be doing the same thing simultaneously all over the world based on different time zones so Australia, New Zealand and Kiribati islands would have just completed the re-launch of Carlsberg's new bottle by the time we begun ours at 9am.
Speaking of sex, you may wonder who these delectable ladies are. Well, you have to read my whole story to the end to find out what they are doing here.
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Kellie Acreman
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Keli Hart
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Sam cooke
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Charlotte Narni
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Miss Kelly Marie
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Bottoms up to Sassy Pandez!


Well, Carlsberg has always been my favourite beer since I visited the brewery in Copenhagen, Denmark years ago and was very impressed by Carlsberg Museum or Glyptotek, the original building that houses the art collection of founder Carl Jacobsen which he decided to share with the public in 1882. I remember I was stunned to see the Swastika signs all over the facade!

I gasped and asked my guide from Danish Tourism Office if Carl Jacobsen was a Nazi supporter and even so, now that World War 2 is over and Hitler is presumed dead, surely the company should be more discreet in its Nazi sympathies.

He laughed. "Yes, most tourists are amazed at this logo that APPEARS to be a swastika of the Third Reich. However, if you look carefully, the wheels or arms/legs turn anti-clockwise as this is the original version and sacred Buddhist symbol of the sun! Hitler corrupted and degraded it by reversing it so it turns clockwise, thus harnessing the dark forces instead of bright rays! The word 'swastika' comes from the Sanskrit 'svastika' which means 'auspicious object'! The swastika symbol appeared 6,000 years ago and was long considered holy, lucky and all powerful bringer of luck. Anyway, Hitler's version stands on one leg at 45 degree rotation which makes it even more diabolical!"

Glyptotek has one of the world's finest if compact collections of paintings, sculptures, statues, works of art and is famous for the frieze depicting the marriage of Alexander the Great to the Bactrian Princess Roxanna. Carlsberg's Elephant Tower with its 4 lifesized elephants still remain in my memory so how could I say nay to its revamp?
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The world famous Elephant Gate at Carlsberg brewery in Copenhagen, Denmark


First we were taken to the factory where photos were forbidden. Strange as I was sure no pressmen were planning to open a rival brewery and if they were, mere photos were insufficient. Then we were taken to a huge purpose built covered stage where pretty girls were ready to serve us beer.
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New bottles, same great taste!


Opposite were three monstrous signboards covered by canvas and next to them was an even bigger signage also draped in cloth which was obviously the new logo. As the wind caused the coverings to flap, Carlsberg workers tried desperately to hold on to the drapes which caused much amusement as we watched their heroic attempts as parts of the gigantic posters were revealed. Anyway it did not take a genius to assume they would be the new bottles of Carlsberg in various sizes, from cans to mid to large. I fantasised a bit about the media's reaction if the covers were removed to reveal my portraits, left, right and full frontal. But this would be equivalent to me receiving an invite for Prince William's wedding.
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No prizes for guessing what is underneath
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The tallest is 6 storeys high
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As if on cue, the wind begun to blow the drapes as these guys hold them on tight
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Oops! There goes the surprise! The wind teasingly pulls the covers apart as the poor guys tried desperately and in vain to hold them together! What man makes, the wind splits asunder!


The guests were Carlsberg retailers, media members and staff from outstation and we had a jolly time waiting for the action to begin. What action we did not know but who cared when there was limitless beer? The longer we waited the better, we decided as we chatted.

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Guests hamming it up


Soren Ravn, managing director of Carlsberg Malaysia made a short speech and looked remarkably young and handsome to hold such a top post. In fact, he looked more like a rock star than CEO. Later I discovered he WAS a rocker and musician and sang Carlsberg anthem a decade ago! He is around 190cm and made me looked like a midget. We then watched a video congratulatory message from the big boss from Copenhagen, Jorgen Buhl Rasmussen, CEO of Carlsberg worldwide.
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Soren Ravn, MD of Carlsberg Malaysia, holds court


The emcee then asked Soren Ravn to climb to the top of the scaffolding strapped in safety harness of course to press a button so all the drapes would fall. He climbed 6 storeys while giving a running commentary! Shows how fit beer drinkers can be!

Alas, the weather refused to cooperate! The winds were blowing in the wrong direction! If the coverings were released they would simply stay put and not bulge as the winds were pressing against them!

The only option?

Pray to the gods in high heaven!

I saw some staff lighting joss sticks at a small shrine or 'tokong' replete with spirit house and offerings. She prayed fervently and so did her male colleagues.
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Staff praying to the gods in high heaven for the wind to change direction!


I of course am a firm believer in prayers to Buddha and Jesus and am always petitioning them for one thing or another. So I fully expected the prayers to be answered! And they were! The winds slowly changed course and Soren pressed the button, the drapes covering the three posters begun descending but the main logo remained stuck for a few minutes before it too obeyed the law of gravity.

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Slowly, slowly,...
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Only the main signage is holding on to its cover but the Crown is exposed
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Carlsberg's Crown and name are now revealed!
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Finally, all is revealed!

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These three are completely revealed, showing the new can, medium and large bottles. MD Soren leading the Long, Cool Danes
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Toasting the new look, crown and bottles!
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Perfect 10 but plus the boss, ocean eleven!


Then a bevy of long, cool Danes appeared!

Scantily clad in green and white dresses with legs that stretched forever, the 10 Danish damsels, specially flown in from Scandinavia at great expense doubtless, trotted out of the brewery, each holding a tray of the new Carlsberg bottles! They looked fabulously sexy, tall, fair and blonde. With their heels, some were almost as tall as Soren!

Such eye candy! I am sure they will be appearing in all the magazines 2 months from now but remember you drool, I mean, saw them here first in my blog!

I thought this was a suitable grand finale and we would be heading for lunch and more beer but we were told Carlsberg's new delivery trucks would make an appearance with their new colours and imagery. One duly rolled in and we clapped politely. I mean, it looked nice and professionally but how exciting can a truck be?
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Unless it contained a live band inside!
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Staff pulling away the canvas to reveal a live band inside!
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All ready to rock and roll!
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The break dancers
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More action
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Party time!
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Like a street parade
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Yahoo and that's it, folks!


Yup, the minions pulled back the canvas to reveal a 16-man band banging away on cartons, drums and barrels of Carlsberg! Then from nowhere it seemed, a breakdance troupe bounced onto the tarmac and started dancing. This was followed by dozens of young dancers doing some fierce aerobics movements and clapping and singing as teenagers are wont to. I almost fell off the stage in excitement had I not held on to Julian who spilled his beer but we were not paying so it was fine.

After the frenetic dancing, we migrated back to HQ for lunch.

All these, I calculated, must have cost around RM 100 million worldwide considering it took 2 years to prepare and decide on the slogan 'That calls for a Carlsberg'. Hmmm, I think it should be 'This calls for a Carlsberg' so I shall have to discuss it with Jorgen Bhul Rasmussen in Copenhagen!

Personally I preferred the allocated money be used to sell Carlsberg at half price for a month! After all, the taste of the beer remains unchanged and the formula is intact. Like me, you cannot improve on perfection! So it is just a newly designed bottle for the same great taste. However, Soren demurred, "No, we prefer to spend millions to promote and strengthen the brand than indulge in discounts! We prefer to invest in marketing costs and retain Carlsberg at premium prices and not to lower prices. Hey, if you want low prices, there is Skol. Also very good beer!"

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The iconic Carlsberg crown, symbol of its link to the Royal Danish court as official beer purveyor, has been streamlined and the packaging looks stunning, young, hip and super oool. It looks modern and sleek and the branding will now be consistent throughout the world. Previously local or regional breweries could tamper with the bottles but now the same bottle can be found (and enjoyed) everywhere, from Kuala Lumpur to Kathmandu to Kenya to Kensington, London! Carlsberg has taken the opposite approach to brands like Coca-Cola which carries the familiar red and white corporate colours but modifies the wordings based on locality. Observed Soren Ravn, "Previously there had been too much de-centralisation so now everything is uniformed throughout the Carlsberg world."

"Carlsberg's famous green logo is famous in Malaysia and 1 out of 2 drinkers prefer our beer," beamed Soren Ravn. "With this new global initiative, we are out to bring the other 1 out of 2 beer drinkers into the fold, so Carlsberg may be raised in every occasion!"

CARLSBERG PROMOTIONS
From now till 20 May 2011, Carlsberg will showcase 6 fabulously sexy female deejays as part of its consumer launch who will perform at Carlsberg outlets throughout Malaysia. The girls are so beautiful and sexy I swear they could be former or current Playboy playmates or Penthouse centrefolds! They look drop dead gorgeous and have killer bods and dress like they ran out of textiles...

I saw their photos and passed out instantly! You saw them earlier but no harm done in seeing them again!
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Charlotte Narni
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Sam Cooke, my favourite
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This one also I like
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Yes yes she looks like but is NOT Lady Gaga
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Miss Kelly Marie
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With Sassy Pandez, That Calls for a Carlsberg!


Why they are working as deejays and not married to Donald Trump is something I don't understand and there are few things I don't understand.

KEEP THESE DATES AND CATCH THEM IN ACTION!

15 April 2011; One Club. Penang
20 April; Eurostar, Sunway Pyramid
21 April; Volar, Ipoh
22 April; Fuel, Penang
27 April; Slippery Senorita, Penang
28 April; Platinum, Kuantan
29 April; Aloha, Jalan P. Ramlee, KL
5 May; Rootz, Jalan Sultan Ismail, KL
6 May; Fuel, Penang
7 May; Gsix, Gardens KL
11 May; Sultan Lounge, KL
12 May; MOIS, Penang
13 May; Aloha, KL
18 May; FAME, Penang
19 May; 20 May; to be confirmed

Details; call 03 2287 2255 Deborah Loo or deborah@brandthinkasia.com

THAT CALLS FOR A CARLSBERG!