Tuesday, September 25, 2012

PART 2---JAMES BOND 50TH BIRTHDAY

KEE@FSWMAG.COM
BOND_49  1962-2012 Danjaq LLC and United Artists Corporation  All rights reserved .jpg
Skyfall is the latest James Bond movie which will premier on 26 October 2012

WHO HAS NEVER HEARD OF JAMES BOND MUST HAVE BEEN HIBERNATING IN SOME MULU CAVES IN SARAWAK FOR THE PAST FEW DECADES.

This sexy, handsome licensed to thrill, grill and kill has gone through 6 James Bond, from Sean Connery to George Lazenby to Roger Moore, Pierce Brosnan and now Daniel Craig and shows no signs of abating.

And why not?

After all, when you have a surefire formula for success guaranteed to sell tickets, why tinker with it? As the wise man says, if it ain't broke, don't fix it!

We all know the formula; the opening scene begins with some quick, dramatic and traumatic event that ends equally chaotically and frenetically. Usually James Bond triumphs yet again but now and then he is thrown into a deep miasma. Then the opening song begins as silhouettes of sexy, hour-glassed female forms begin to, well, form as blood curdles and drips across the scene as James Bond walks into a target circle, turns sharply and fires a bullet.

There is always 2 or 3 or 4 sexy, well developed, breasty women who are either on the side of angels or evil incarnates, including one that tries to kill him by crushing him with her thunder thighs.

All the women have incredibly horny, provocative and shamelessly sexual names. What can be more vaginal and cunty than Pussy Galore (played by Honor Blackman in Goldfinger), Octopussy (played by Maud Adams in Octopussy), Dr Holly Goodhead (played by Lois Chiles in Moonraker), Mary Goodnight (played by Britt Ekland in Man With The Golden Gun), Miranda Frost (played by Rosamund Pike in Die Another Day), Kissy Suzuki (played by Mie Hama in You Only Live Twice), Paris Carver (played by Teri Hatcher in Tomorrow Never Dies), Elektra King (played by Sophie Marceau in The World Is Not Enough), Dr Christmas Jones (played by Denise Richards in The World Is Not Enough) and of course Honey Ryder (played by Ursula Andress in Dr No) and it all started with this Honey who appeared in the very first James Bond movie!

Other salubrious names include Strawberry Fields (played by Gemma Arterton in Quantum of Solace), Jenny Flex (played by Alison Doody in A View To A Kill, Solitaire (played by Jane Seymour in Live And Let Die), Jinx (played by Halle Berry in Die Another Day), Plenty O'Toole and Xenia Onatopp.

Surprisingly, the only Chinky girl to be a Bond Girl, our very own Datuk Michelle Yeoh, was given a deadly boring name of Wai Ling which has baffled Bond fans. Why Wai Ling which is not a pun nor even mildly pornographic? Why not Cun Tit, Chee Bye, Chao Chibai, Pukeema, Tait Klit, Kani Nabo or Kunt   
Ma or some such erotic names for which Bond script writers are justly famous?

Wai Ling indeed! What a letdown. 

Francoise Therry in The Man With The Golden Gun has a sexier, cutier and funnier name Chew Mee and she was not even Chinese!

Think of Holly Goodhead giving good head, Pussy Galore showing off her cunt, Octopussy playing with her 8-sided vagina or Kissy Suzuki French kissing atop a motorbike. Or Christmas cumming every day and not just on 25 December?

Bibi Dahl in For Your Eyes Only was so called because the actress Lynn -Holly Johnson looked like a 'Baby Doll'. Honey Ryder (Dr No) likes to ride men, not horses. Xenia Onatopp (Goldeneye) likes to be on top and is her preferred sexual position.

Plenty O'Toole in Diamonds Are Forever is also a sexual name as 'tool' refers to penis. James Bond even asks Plenty if she was named after her father!

In Never Say Never Again, Barbara Carrera plays Fatima Blush though she never blushes as she is so hardcore. Also in the same movie, Kim Basinger plays Domino Petachi and we all know the Domino Effect. 

In Diamonds Are Forever, Jill St John plays Tiffany Case, as in a jewel box by Tiffany's, America's top jeweller. In The World Is Not Enough, Serena Scott Thomas plays Molly Warmflash and her flesh was warm and she was a flash in the pan as she has not been heard of since.

And who can ever forget May Day, the mayhem-causing black sexpot played by scandalously provocative Grace Jones whose real life antics titillated the entertainment industry in the Eighties long before Lady Gaga was born.

I think the most ridiculous name of all Bond women is Peaceful Fountains of Desire played by Filipina Rachel Grant who played the assassin posing as masseuse in Die Another Day!

We should all bid for these James Bond items as ALL money raised will go to charity, not into the pockets of Michael Wilson, Barbara Brocolli, MGM, EON Productions and Danjag!


BENEFITTING TWELVE CHARITABLE INSTITUTIONS

UNICEF UK

The National Youth Theatre of Great Britain

Parkinson's UK

The Science Museum

First Light

The Art Fund

ORBIS

TICKETS FOR TROOPS

The Royal Navy & Royal Marines Charity

ChildLine

Women for Women International

Barnardo’s

A printed collector’s edition catalogue is available to buy at Christie’s salerooms and online; RRP. £30 each
All proceeds from the auction, including catalogue sales, will go directly to the designated charities.

THESE ITEMS WILL BE AUCTIONED ON 5 OCTOBER 2012 IN CHRISTIE'S SOUTH KENSINGTON IN LONDON BY INVITATION ONLY. 5 OCTOBER HAS BEEN DESIGNATED 'GLOBAL JAMES BOND DAY'!

BOND_49  1962-2012 Danjaq LLC and United Artists Corporation  All rights reserved .jpg
BOND_49  1962-2012 Danjaq LLC and United Artists Corporation  All rights reserved .jpg
BOND_49  1962-2012 Danjaq LLC and United Artists Corporation  All rights reserved .jpg
BOND_49  1962-2012 Danjaq LLC and United Artists Corporation  All rights reserved .jpg
BOND_49  1962-2012 Danjaq LLC and United Artists Corporation  All rights reserved .jpg
BOND_49  1962-2012 Danjaq LLC and United Artists Corporation  All rights reserved .jpg
BOND_49  1962-2012 Danjaq LLC and United Artists Corporation  All rights reserved .jpg
BOND_49  1962-2012 Danjaq LLC and United Artists Corporation  All rights reserved .jpg
BOND_49  1962-2012 Danjaq LLC and United Artists Corporation  All rights reserved .jpg
Many will pay hundreds of thousand of pounds for one night in bed with this guy!
WWW.CHRISTIES.COM/BOND
Public Exhibition:
Saturday, 29 September: 11am – 5pm
Sunday, 30 September: 11am – 5pm
Monday, 1 October: 9am – 7.30pm
Tuesday, 2 October: 9am – 5pm
Wednesday, 3 October: 9am – 5pm
Thursday, 4 October: 9am – 5pm
Friday, 5 October: 9am – 5pm

Auction:
50 Years of James Bond – The Auction (Online)
Friday, 28 September - Monday, 8 October 2012 *Auction opens at 2pm GMT; lots close from 2pm GMT
50 Years of James Bond – The Auction (Evening)
Friday, 5 October 2012 at 8.30pm

*By Invitation Only

EON Productions Limited and Danjaq LLC are wholly owned and controlled by the Broccoli/Wilson family. Danjaq is the US based company that co-owns, with MGM, the copyright in the existing James Bond films and controls the right to produce future James Bond films as well as all worldwide merchandising. EON Productions, an affiliate of Danjaq, is the UK based production company which makes the James Bond films. The 007 franchise is the longest running in film history with twenty-two films produced since 1962. Michael G Wilson and Barbara Broccoli succeeded Albert R ‘Cubby’ Broccoli and have produced some of the most successful Bond films ever including CASINO ROYALE and QUANTUM OF SOLACE. They are currently producing the 23rd film, SKYFALL.

About UNICEF
UNICEF is the world’s leading organisation working for children and their rights in more than 190 countries. As champion of the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child, UNICEF works to help every child realise their full potential. Together with our partners, UNICEF delivers health care, nutrition, education and protection to children in urgent need, while working with governments to ensure they deliver on their promise to protect and promote the rights of every child. UNICEF relies entirely on voluntary donations from individuals, governments, institutions and corporations, and is not funded by the UN budget. For more information, please visit www.unicef.org.uk.

Christie’s South Kensington
Open seven days a week, Christie’s South Kensington is one of the busiest salerooms in the UK attracting over 200,000 visitors each year. With over 100 sales and offering more than 20,000 lots annually, estimates start from £300. Interiors sales dedicated to home furnishings are held three times a month alongside regular Sunday sales of single-owner collections. Specialised sales for the avid collector are scheduled throughout the year according to category, and include Film Posters, Pop Memorabilia, Antiquities, Jewellery, 20th Century British Art and Chinese Works of Art, among others. In 2011 Christie’s South Kensington realised the highest ever total for the second successive year with sales of £115.9 million / $186.6 million.

About Christie’s
Christie’s, the world's leading art business, had global auction and private sales in the first half of 2012 that totaled £2.2 billion/$3.5 billion. Christie’s is a name and place that speaks of extraordinary art, unparalleled service and expertise, as well as international glamour. Founded in 1766 by James Christie, Christie's has since conducted the greatest and most celebrated auctions through the centuries providing a popular showcase for the unique and the beautiful.

Christie’s offers over 450 auctions annually in over 80 categories, including all areas of fine and decorative arts, jewellery, photographs, collectibles, wine, and more. Prices range from $200 to over $100 million. Christie's also has a long and successful history conducting private sales for its clients in all categories, with emphasis on Post-War and Contemporary, Impressionist and Modern, Old Masters and Jewellery.

Private sales totaled £413.4 million/ $661.5 million in the first half of 2012, an increase of 53% on the previous year.
Christie’s has a global presence with 53 offices in 32 countries and 10 salerooms around the world including in London, New York, Paris, Geneva, Milan, Amsterdam, Dubai, Z├╝rich, and Hong Kong. More recently, Christie’s has led the market with expanded initiatives in growth markets such as Russia, China, India and the United Arab Emirates, with successful sales and exhibitions in Beijing, Mumbai and Dubai.

*Estimates do not include buyer’s premium. Sales totals are hammer price plus buyer’s premium and do not reflect costs, financing fees or application of buyer’s or seller’s credits.
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ALL IMAGES FROM CHRISTIE'S, DANJAQ, LLC AND UNITED ARTISTS CORPORATION